Causing a stink with yellow cards

I've been at more than one high school soccer match when a player has been yellow-carded, only to hear somebody on the sidelines remark "That call stinks" (or other words unprintable). In the case of an English soccer player this year, the yellow card came AFTER an assault on the olfactory senses.

I found this story quite by accident, while researching a point I wanted clarification on for a local high school story, but decided it needed further investigation. A few mouse clicks later, I found the version I trusted. An April 5 story posted on the BBC Web site stated "A referee ordered a penalty kick be retaken in a Sunday league football game when an opposition player broke wind as the ball was kicked."

I would have gone with a silent-but-deadly.

The player, from the Chorlton Villa team, received a yellow card for what the referee deemed "unsporting behavior." The player from the opposing International Manchester club who took and was stopped on the initial kick, was awarded another kick and scored, although Chorlton Villa went on to post a 6-4 win.

Given that the pitch was full of male players, I'm sure the attempts to stifle giggles, chortles and guffaws was as comical, if not as noisy, as the "peep" in question. It was not known at press time if the carded player had any intentions of changing his pre-game eating habits.

I, for one, applaud the referee, who decided that enough is enough. I'm going to start carrying my own yellow card, to wave in the face of gaseous perpetrators to not only admonish them for their actions, but also to circulate enough breeze to wave away the results. Stay away from me now in public places, because I'll be there, yellow card-a-waving, to make sure if you try a "sneak attack," you'll receive full and proper credit for your creation.

With steroid use, players carrying guns, or demanding so much money that ticket prices rocket out of sight, there is lot about sports that stinks - but at least now, one man has taken a stand.

Craig Purcell is sports editor for Tri-County Newspapers. Contact him at 824-1036 or cpurcell@tcnpress.com.